


A Spade Upside Down Is A Heart

by ApocalypseSiren



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Ashen Romance | Auspistice, Caliginous Romance | Kismesis, F/M, Flushed Romance | Matesprits, Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-09-17
Updated: 2013-11-19
Packaged: 2017-12-26 20:51:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,602
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/970160
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ApocalypseSiren/pseuds/ApocalypseSiren
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Your name is Eridan Ampora, and it's not every day Kanaya asks you for help, nor it is everyday that you find yourself forced to take care of you ex-kismesis.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Vriska

**Author's Note:**

> My first Homestuck fanfic!  
> Still a WIP, so I'll try to get new chapters out as often as I can!

**Chapter One: Vriska.**

Your name is Eridan Ampora and it’s not every day Kanaya comes to you for help.  
  
 _GrimAuxilitrix [GA ] began trolling CaligulasAquarium [CA]:_  
GA: Eridan  
CA: wwhats up kan  
GA: I Need Your Help  
CA: you need my help  
GA: Yes  
CA: wwhat for  
GA: Can You Come To My Hive  
CA: wwhy  
GA: It’s Important

_GrimAuxilitrix [GA] ceased trolling CaligulasAqarium [CA]._

Damn it, Kan, you think to yourself, why couldn’t she just tell you what was going on, having to go inland to visit her is just too much. Especially since your and Vriska’s kismesitude fell apart. You used to enjoy travelling to see your auspistice, but without the relationship to manage, visiting Kanaya had become a chore.  
                However, Kanaya never asked you to visit, so you knew it had to be extremely important, and she asked for your help! That never happened, ever – you tended to cause people’s problems, not solve them.  
                You reluctantly pull your sweater on and head outside. Her hive is a fair walk from yours, and if she wanted you there urgently you thought you might as well leave as soon as you could.

You look down at the pathetic excuse of a girl lying in Kanaya’s bed, her face flushed cerulean, and sweat beading on her forehead.  
                ‘It’s bad.’ Kanaya says to you, mopping Vriska’s foreheard with a damp cloth.  
                ‘Not my problem.’ You walk out of the room, you couldn’t care less about her if you tried. She got sick, good for her, it wasn’t your problem to fix.  
                Kanaya follows you and grabs your wrist, growling at you. ‘She’s dying.’  
                ‘Not my problem.’ You repeat. ‘Your job was to make sure I didn’t kill her, it’s not my place to keep her alive.’  
                ‘Eridan!’ You feel her nails digging into your wrist, if she squeezed any harder she’d draw blood. ‘She’s dying!’  
                You sigh, you hated seeing her exasperated. ‘Fine.’  
                ‘Thank you.’ She lets go of your wrist and busies herself dampening the cloth she had used on Vriska’s forehead.  ‘If it helps at all, Tavros is coming in a few hours, you’ll be free to go then.’  
                ‘Good.’ He actually cared about her, and you knew he would take better care of her than you would. You were only doing this for Kanaya.  
                She rolled her eyes and handed you the cloth and a bottle of water. ‘She hasn’t had anything to drink for days; it’s not helping her fever at all.’ She looked into the room, sighing. ‘You have to sit with her, keep an eye on her.’  
                ‘I can’t stay out here?’  
                ‘Just in case something happens.’ She pushes you gently, guiding you back in the room. You notice now that a small wooden stool is beside the bed.  
                You sigh and sit on the stool, you’re too tall to sit comfortably, but with Kanaya’s gaze on you, you don’t want to risk upsetting her by standing up.  
                ‘Just try give her some water every so often.’ She took the bottle of water off you, resting it against Vriska’s lips, and tipping a small amount out. It runs across her cracked lips and drips onto the pillow. She sighs, defeated, and you know she’s been trying to get her to drink this way for a long time.  
                ‘Let me try.’ You ease the bottle out of her hand. She watches you warily, you know that she doesn’t trust you with this. Just as gently as she did, you press the bottle to the cerulean-blood’s lips. You let a little water run across her lips, and just as it had earlier, it drips onto the pillow. You hear Kanaya sigh, but you’re ready to use a different tactic.  
                Before she can stop you, you have given the bottle a quick tip, spilling water all over Vriska’s face.  
                ‘How could you? She’s sick! She doesn’t need you---‘ Kanaya freezes, her eyes wide. Vriska’s lips have parted, and because you tipped so much water on her, a substantial amount of it had gone into her mouth. ‘She’s drinking.’  
                You nod.  
                ‘She’s taking water from you.’ She says in disbelief.  
                You nod again.  
                ‘No, you don’t understand I’ve been trying for…’  
                ‘Just go, Kan.’ You cut her off gently. ‘Relax, whatever. I’ll do this, for you.’  
                She nods gratefully and slips out of the room, leaving you alone with Vriska. Without her around, the room is silent expect for her laboured breaths.  
                You place your hand on her forehead; her skin is substantially warmer than the coolness you expect of someone of her caste. She presses her forehead into your hand and you pull away instantly. Your cool hand against her skin must have been a relief to the fever.  
                ‘What happened to you, Vris?’ You mumble, watching her. ‘You look so damn pathetic.’ You laugh bitterly; she can’t hear you but you still insist on talking. ‘I’d be embarrassed to have you as a kismesis, you know? Bundled up like a dying grub. You might as well be culled.’  
                Her eyes flicker open as you speak, and you think she is trying to glare at you, but all you get is an unfocused, deadpan look for a few seconds before her eyelids droop and she’s back to sleep.  
                You shake your head, and run the damp cloth over her face. This had been the first time you had seen Vriska and she hadn’t tried to gouge your eyes out, or bite you with those fangs.  
                Looking at her lying in the bed, you could barely remember how she had been. She looks so helpless, you can’t help but feel some pity for her, but at the same time, you felt a little glad that she was finally out of commission. You hated her even more after she ended your relationship, and seeing her like this, well, you thought it was karma finally coming back to bite her.  
                You sigh and lean back in your chair, it had barely been ten minutes and you were already bored. How long until Kanaya came back? You didn’t remember, and it was a few hours until the lowblood, Tavros, showed up to take her off your hands.  
                The pillow around Vriska’s head is soaking wet from where you tipped the water on her. For Kanaya’s sake, you go back out into the kitchen to get a tea towel, and take it back to the bedroom. Gently, you lift Vriska’s head – grateful that she was incapable of biting you – and slide the tea towel beneath her head, so that she was no longer lying in the wet spot.  
                You sit back down, and it doesn’t take you long to notice that her hair is wet as well. With a loud and melodramatic sigh – hoping that Kanaya would hear you no matter where she is – you push a wet lock of her hair out of her face. It didn’t help much, and there were still some stray black strands across her face. You brush them away, roughly – hell, you didn’t want to make it romantic! – and as you do you feel a sudden, sharp pain.  
                ‘Fuck Vris!’ You yelp as she sinks her fangs into the fleshy part of your hand, near your thumb. You thought she had been out cold, not semi-lucid.  
                Her eyes open again, the same unfocused gaze, and you wish you could just pull away, but you knew from experience that doing so would trigger her to inject venom into your bloodstream. You were in a coma for a month after that.  
                She mumbles something through your hand before releasing her grip and closing her eyes again. Your indigo blood is on her lips, and the wound in your hand is dripping on the bed sheets.  
                Making sure she is completely out again, you sulk out into the kitchen, running your hands under the tap water, and digging around for bandages in the cupboards. Luckily, Kanaya had recently bought medical supplies – you assume because of Vriska’s illness – and you easily find a roll of bandages.  
                You return to the bedroom and sit beside her, at a much safer distance, of course. She seems to be breathing easier; her chest isn’t shaking as much as it had been with every breath, not that you were looking.  
                She certainly had uh, matured, since you had last seen her, that’s for sure. You rub the wound on your hand, and it reminds you of the constant hours you spent patching yourself up every time you and Vriska met up. When your kismesitude began, you’d send her away limping, almost broken and half dead, but as it progressed you got softer, you let her land a few blows. You still had scars from that.  
                You’re not sure what happened to you. Kanaya said that sometimes hate didn’t last – which you guess was fair enough given that you were only young – but you still harboured feelings for Vriska. You even let her hurt you just to make her happy. You reckon you might have been flushed for her, once.  
                Looking down at her now reminded you of that. It reminded you of the damage you used to deal to her, and the bite on your hand added to that. An uneasy feeling rose in your chest. You were feeling…bad?...for what happened so long ago.  
                You shook your head. You weren’t meant to feel like that. You hated her then and you still despised her now. _I’m only here because Kan asked_ you remind yourself. You couldn’t care less about what happened to Vriska. But still….  
                A tap at the door brings you out of your musings. Tavros is standing timidly in the doorway.  
                ‘What?’ You snarl, hiding your injured hand behind you.  
                ‘Kanaya asked me to come.’ He replied, his voice shaking.  
                ‘Not for a few glubbing hours.’  
                He visibly recoils as you speak. ‘I thought you’d appreciate being able to leave.’  
                You glower at him, and he shrinks back. At least the filthy lowblood knows his place. ‘I don’t need your help.’  
                ‘I wasn’t offering you help.’  
                Smartass. ‘You can leave.’  
                ‘Kanaya asked me to come early and let you go.’  
                Of course she did. She must have felt bad after the fuss you kicked up. You sigh and glare at Tavros. ‘Well I think I’ll be staying until Kanaya returns.’  
                ‘But I’m supposed to be taking care of her!’ His face went a dark shade of brown as he spoke, and you couldn’t help but chuckle to yourself. He was well and truly flushed for her. ‘What’s so funny?’  
                You shake your head.  ‘You think I’m actually going to let you just waltz in here?’  
                He takes a few confident steps into the room and you stand up, you’re taller than him by a few inches, and you know that you’re strong enough to take him on if you had to. Not that you would, you were sure that he wouldn’t push too hard, especially with Vriska unconscious; he was just showing off for her.  
                You glare at him, staring him down. As expected, it doesn’t take long for him to lose his pseudo-confident swagger, and by the time he reaches the foot of the bed he is visibly trembling.  
                ‘I don’t need you here.’ You say, and that does it. With a defiant look, he backs out of the room, and you hear the front door to Kanaya’s hive close not long after. You knew he was going to tell Kanaya what happened, and you didn’t care. You weren’t going to let a lowblood around your Vriska.  
                Your Vriska? You shake your head. Vriska, just Vriska.


	2. Chapter Two: Auspistice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading this so far! With exams coming up I won't be able to write, so this will probably the last chapter until December! Enjoy!

**Chapter Two: Auspistice.**

What the fuck? You rub your eyes, adjusting to the now light bedroom. Had you fallen asleep? One glance at Kanaya’s bedside clock tells you, yes you had.  You sigh and sit up, looking over at Vriska. Still sound asleep, or unconscious, whatever.  
                You stand up and stretch your back, groaning. It was painful sleeping on the floor and your body didn’t appear to be ready to forgive you so soon.  
                You open the bedroom door, peering out into the kitchen area. Had Kanaya come home yet? If she hadn’t, you were deeply regretting scaring Tavros away. But if you hadn’t…You shake your head; what were you thinking when you did that? He was a lowblood, she wasn’t much better, so why did you care? Why did that feeling plant itself on your chest.  
                You glance back at Vriska, watching the steady rise and fall of her chest for a few minutes; at least she was still alive. You shrug and head out into the kitchen.  
                A human girl is slumped across the table, and Kanaya is fussing around her, holding a wet cloth to her forehead and tenderly giving her water to drink. If it wasn’t for the girl lifting her head to sip from the cup, you would have assumed she had whatever had knocked Vriska out.  
                Kanaya looks up as you click the door shut behind you. ‘I thought you’d never wake up.’ She says, stroking the hair of the girl on the table. The girl says something, but Kanaya hushes her and gets her to lay her head back down.  
                ‘Sorry?’ You shrug.    
                ‘Tavros told me what happened.’ She continued, not even looking at you anymore. ‘I thought you would have appreciated being able to leave early. Instead, you sleep on the floor beside her.’  
                You feel yourself blush. Fuck. You take a deep breath before speaking, hoping the stop the violet tinge spreading across your face. ‘Why would you even want a lowblood to care for her anyway? You know he only wanted to help to be around her.’  
                ‘And you didn’t?’  
                You sink into your scarf, the blush now burning your cheeks so much that you’re almost sure you’re glowing. Kanaya could read you so easily, it wasn’t fair, you were confused about your feelings and you knew she knew.  
                ‘I asked Tavros to come earlier because if you were caliginous for her, you’d have let him take over. After all, what’s the use of a kismesis if they can’t fight back?’  
                ‘I didn’t want a lowblood around her.’ You try to weasel your way out of a confession. ‘She’d have hated him being there if she was awake. It was out of respect.’  
                ‘I’ve heard he’s flushed for her. Maybe she reciprocates those feelings.’  
                ‘Vris would never flush for a lowblood.’  
                ‘You sound so sure.’ Kanaya’s smirk widens, and you know what she’s looking for you to say.  
                ‘I know Vris.’  
                ‘You don’t know what she would flush for though.’  
                You feel your heart sink, like you’d just been shot with Ahab’s Crosshairs. That was stone cold, even for Kanaya to say.  
                She turned back to nursing the human, stroking her hair gently. You watched her, stunned at how she could be so cold towards you, then so gentle towards her human.  
                 ‘I’m not saying she wouldn’t flush for you.’ She looked back up at you, finally registering the shattered look on your face.  ‘I’m just saying that you can’t be certain, Eridan, it’ll hurt more that way.’  
                You nod. ‘I know, Kan, I know.’ You feel your voice shake as you speak, echoing the hurt and confusion you felt.  
                ‘Can you take this to her?’ She slides a bowl of soup across the table.  
                You nod again and pick it up carefully, leaning gently against the bedroom door to open it. You glance back to see Kanaya cooing over the human girl again and sigh, she was right. It didn’t matter how well you knew Vriska, you just didn’t know what she’d flush for.  
                ‘Eridan.’ Kanaya looks up at you once again before you manage to close the door.  
                You pause, your elbow holding the door open, and the bowl of soup starting to burn your hands. ‘What?’  
                She smiled softly. ‘You don’t know what she’d flush for.’ You feel another arrow piece your heart, and you wonder if that comment was necessary. ‘But, you of all people know what she’s caliginous for, and that’s a good place to start.’  
                You let the door close, pondering what she had said. You knew what Vriska went black for, so you could avoid that, right? You sigh once again to yourself and retake your seat beside Vriska’s sleeping figure, placing the soup on the bedside table.  
                Or maybe Kanaya was right in a completely different way, the closest thing to love was hate.


	3. Rose

**Chapter Three: Rose**

Hours passed, and Vriska had not taken a single spoonful of soup, hot or cold.  
                ‘Why won’t you glubbing eat?’ You growl, your gills flaring in frustration. Even unconscious, Vriska had the innate ability to piss you off, but this time, your frustration was more worry than anger. ‘You’ll glubbing starve to death!’  
                There is a sharp knock at the door, causing you to jump, you were so focused on feeding Vriska you kept forgetting that you were in someone else’s hive. ‘Kan?’  
                The blonde-haired girl opened the door slightly and slipped in, closing it quietly behind her. ‘Kanaya told me not to come in here.’ She said, looking at her feet.  
                ‘Oh.’ You return your attention to Vriska, you weren’t interested in the humans that your species had recently encountered. ‘Why not?’  
                ‘Apparently highbloods are dangerous.’ She sat on the end of the bed.   
                You chuckled, of course Kan would tell her human girl that.   
                ‘What’s so funny?’ She watched you warily.  
                ‘Kan’s right, that’s all.’ You smirk, flashing your sharp teeth. ‘Highbloods are dangerous, especially us seadwellers.’  
                ‘That’s fascinating.’ She said casually, even though you could easily tell that she wanted to leave the room. ‘What makes you so dangerous?’  
                ‘Violent tendencies.’ You unravelled the bandage off your hand, revealing the swollen, bloody indigo mark where Vriska had bitten you the night before. ‘She’s unconscious, and a few castes below me. Imagine what I could do.’  
                Her eyes widened. ‘Is that what a kismesis can do? Kanaya said they were violent.’  
                ‘Oh no.’ You grin, you were enjoying this, you could see the fear in her eyes. ‘Vris and I were caliginous one, not now. This is simply what one troll can do to another.’ You wrap the bandage back around your hand, securing it tightly. ‘During out kismesitude she managed to put me in a coma.’  
                ‘Oh my.’   
                You nod. ‘All trolls are like that though, blackrom is blackrom regardless of caste. Us highbloods, Kanaya included, are just more inclined towards violence.’   
                ‘Kanaya would never hurt me!’ She stood and raised her voice. ‘She promised she wouldn’t!’  
                ‘How sure are you?’  
                ‘I’m positive, even as a rainbow drinker she said she’d never….’  
                ‘Rose!’ The door flung open and a very flustered Kanaya rushed into the room. ‘I told you not to come in here.’  
                ‘I was curious.’  
                ‘Apparently highbloods are dangerous.’ You glared at Kanaya. ‘You think I’d hurt your matesprit?’  
                ‘Matesprit?’ Rose looked between you and Kanaya.  
                ‘Partner.’ Kanaya translated. ‘And Eridan, it’s not you I’m worried about her being around, it’s her.’ She motioned towards Vriska. ‘If she wakes up, things could go terribly, terribly wrong if Rose happened to be in here!’  
                ‘Why’s that?’  
                ‘We have thicker skin than you.’ You said before Kanaya had the chance to explain. ‘The wound on my hand? She’d probably have managed to tear yours off.’  
                Rose looked to Kanaya, who nodded. ‘Vriska in particular.’ She sighed. ‘Rose, please wait out in the kitchen for a minute.’  
                Rose didn’t need to be asked twice, she glanced at you, then to Vriska, before hurrying out of the room, clicking the door shut behind her.  
                ‘You shouldn’t have told her that.’ You growled. ‘I’m not violent.’  
                ‘Like I said, I’m more worried about Vriska.’  
                ‘Do you think she could hurt anyone in the state she’s in?’  
                ‘She bit you, didn’t she?’ Kanaya bared her own teeth at you. ‘Look, Eridan, I just don’t want Rose getting hurt, she’s only human, she wouldn’t survive anything if Vriska woke up. You know what it’s like being flushed.’  
                ‘No, I don’t actually.’ You snarled, you could feel your gills flaring, as they always did when you were confronted.  ‘Even you said, I only know black.’  
                ‘Don’t use that tone with me.’ She hissed.   
                ‘I’ll use whatever glubbing tone I want, Kan.’ You stand.   
                ‘Not in my hive you won’t.’  
                ‘Are you kicking me out?’ Panic struck you; you couldn’t be separated from Vriska, not now, not with the way you felt.  
                ‘Are you going to calm down?’  
                You sigh and nod, feeling your gills lay back against the side of your head. ‘I’m just stressed.’ You glanced over to Vriska, relieved to see the slight rise and fall of her chest. ‘What if she’s really sick.’  
                Kanaya came and stood beside you, placing a hand on your shoulder. ‘All we can do is try our best, take care of her as best we can. That’s all we can do.’  
                You nod again. ‘What if she…dies?’ You swallow hard, the very thought made you physically sick.  
                ‘Then we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it. Think positively for now, Eridan, negative thoughts won’t help her get better at all.’  
                ‘Yeah.’ You say half-heartedly, sitting back down beside the bed, trying your best not to let her see how shaken you were. You didn’t want Vriska to die, but at the same time, you were terrified that she’d wake and want nothing to do with you, and you weren’t sure which was more terrifying.


End file.
